Do you remember who sat next to you in church this weekend? How about who sat behind or in front of you? Chances are that you may never see one of those individuals or families again. They will go missing.
Sadly, it is this “one-step forward, one-step back” problem that has been plaguing church outreach efforts for a long long time. This doesn’t have to be the case.
It is said that it takes around 8 friendships in order for someone to feel stable in a community. Humans crave a sense of community. If this community doesn’t quickly form around new members they will inevitably go missing. Here are 7 key practices when it comes to ministering to missing members.
Leave inactive members on mailing list
Just because they are not in attendance does not mean they do not want to keep up-to-date.
Many would be surprised that even though missing and inactive members may not regularly attend church they still like to keep abreast of the activities of the church. We must also keep in mind that while some are missing from church they are still members of the church. Newsletters, church mailings, and social media post, all keep missing members aware of the happenings of the church. Could it be that a communication posting can draw an inactive or missing member back to the house of God?
Watch for inactive members on Sabbath mornings when they visit
They may arrive late and leave early.
We tend to think of inactive or former members as being “out in the world” when, in reality, they may be sitting in church only a few feet away from us. Keep in mind they don’t arrive wearing “backslider” signs, and they may arrive late and leave early so they won’t get badgered by well meaning Christians who may not know what to say.
Pray but don't nag family members who have stopped attendance
Remember we can’t do the work of the Holy Spirit.
The worst thing you can do is to constantly nag a family member about coming back to church. Even though we are concerned we cannot do the job of the Holy Spirit. Our job is to plant the seed of God’s grace, love, and compassion and God will water the seed. Remember, always speak well of the church, especially around family members, they are listening.
Consider anointing the former member who becomes ill
In Matthew 25:35-40, Jesus speaks of several acts of kindness. People may not always remember your words, but they will remember how you made them feel. There is no better time to show kindness then when someone is sick or ill. Not only does the immediate person benefit, but the person’s family may see your Christ-like deeds and be won to Christ.
Apologize for the church when former member feels wounded
Church hurt is real. I’ve known many persons who have stopped attending church because of a hurt they received from a church member. The old adage, “Sticks and stone may break my bones, but words will never hurt me” is a lie. Words hurt. Read James 3:5-6, “In the same way, the tongue is a small thing that makes grand speeches.But a tiny spark can set a great forest on fire. And among all the parts of the body, the tongue is a flame of fire. It is a whole world of wickedness, corrupting your entire body. It can set your whole life on fire, for it is set on fire by hell itself.” Apologize on behalf of the church for the wrongs that may have been done.
Pray the God will allow their heart to be open for a personal visit
a. Read Matthew 27:24-54 daily, then plead the merits of Jesus’ shed blood on behalf of the inactive person and pray that their sins will be blotted out.
b. Pray for the Holy Spirit to minister the graces of redemption for them and fight their spiritual battles, even though they haven’t asked for this kind of help.
c. Pray this way daily, recognizing that the person you’re praying for has the power of choice, but that the Holy Spirit now can work with added power in the person’s life.
d. Give thanks daily for what God is doing in the life of the person you’re praying for, whether you see any results or not.
Ask the Holy Spirit to recreate the spiritual faculties
Looking to the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus (Rom. 8:2) to do this miraculous work.
God says in Jeremiah 3:22 says, “Return, ye backsliding children, and I will heal your back slidings. Behold, we come unto thee; for thou art the LORD our God.” Please remember, missing and former members belong to God. Our job is to love them like Jesus loves them and trust God to return them and heal their back slidings.
Have you reached out to that new face? Each member has a role to play in this effort. While we're seeking new souls to win to the Kingdom of God, we must not forget that there are familiar souls are able to be brought back to the fellowship of Christ.
With a little intentionality we can stem the tide on this missing member epidemic by not only going out and getting them, but by keeping the back door closed.